Breaking Up Is Hard To Do..

Oh boy. Last night was difficult indeed. You know, love has a way of changing your life. At one point you’re in love and both of you are feeling effortless in keeping the relationship going. The time just flies by and you’re both happy. Then a turn happens in one or the other’s life and you get thrown off course. You can either work to get back on course or just fall off completely. In my case it turned out to be too much work for the both of us. Things would happen in either of our lives at different times and we were off course with each other. So as another page in my life has turned, another romantic relationship has come and gone. All is not lost however. I wanted to catch this one early before it got too late. We both recognized that what we had going we weren’t really ready for right now. So much is coming up on both of our plates that we had no time for each other and we weren’t giving each other what we needed. We are going to savor this new friendship and have fun the rest of the contract without worrying about how the other is doing. This relieves some of the burden off of both of us right now. If it’s meant to be, the universe will bring us together again, but for now it’s just a friendship. Yes, I’m sad it’s not a romantic relationship anymore. I’ll definitely miss the affection, but I’d rather have a good friendship than become bitter and have the rest of the contract eat me alive. Where will life take me next? Come on, I’m ready. I have to face my fears now instead of running away from them. Too many people in the US are hiding under this protective shield and not experiencing their lives. I want to get out there. It sounds frightening, but I don’t want to regret anything when I depart this world.

In other news, my computer is STILL out of commission. That sucks!! I’m beginning to despise the US and it’s G.W. Bush feared people. I’ve been taking my computer off the ship in my backpack in Alaska (US) for 4 months and I’ve had no problems. Why all of a sudden does Florida (Port Everglades) suddenly have a problem with me taking a computer off the ship? It’s not like I’m smuggling it or anything. It’s broken!!! Or do they think I have a bomb? Who knows? No one told me I had to fill out a customs declaration form to take it off. I wasn’t leaving the ship permanently. I was just going off for the day as I always have and with no form. Customs officials blocked my exit saying I needed this form. Well, the HRO office is closed on that day and I had no way of getting this form. I also come to find out later that this form usually needs a 48 hours advanced approval so I was screwed anyway. I gave up and left my computer on board and left to have a relaxing day in port. Well, relaxing after what I could savor from that stressful morning. I went to the huge mall in Miami, had a great lunch at Cheesecake Factory, helped Chris pick out his new computer (of which I’m so jealous of ;) ), and did a little shopping to make up for the lack of computer I have. I have all the forms now, but this next Ft. Lauderdale is a US Coast Guard inspection that may shrink my window of time to get down to Miami. I’m 10 more days without a computer. I hope that the MAC store can fix it cheaply next Ft. Lauderdale AND I hope I can get there. Otherwise, another 10 days. Oy!! What curve balls will be pitched at me next?

I had a fabulous time in Half Moon Cay (Holland America’s private island). The water is absolutely gorgeous and we had a beautiful day. I’m stuck on board today in Aruba. Boo!! Everyone’s going off to beach bathe, eat fabulous food, and party. We’re here until midnight of course. I’ll miss it, but we’ll do it all again next Aruba and better since our dance captain’s boyfriend will be on and it’s my partner’s last week in the shows. She’s going on to a brand new ship for next season. Kudos to her and she’s been fabulous to work with. I’ll have Curacao to make up for today tomorrow. I can still tan by the pool.

I should have some pictures up soon or once I get back to NYC in December. SO, keep on checking the site for updates. I know some of you come here a lot. It’s nice to shout out and know that someone is listening. That’s all for now. Life keeps on rolling and I’m on for the ride.